Thursday, 29 December 2011

The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo (2011)

Now with less subtitles

Disgraced journalist Mikael Blomkvist (Daniel Craig) is hired by reitred CEO Henrik Vanger (Christopher Plummer) to solve the case of Harriet Vanger, his niece who has been missing for forty years and believes one of his family was responsible for murdering Harriet. Mikael manages to uncover a link between Harriet and a serial killer of women, and asks for the help of cyberpunk computer hacker Lisbeth Salander (Rooney Mara).

Captain America: The First Avenger (2011)

Perfectly viewed with a certain Team America song playing

It is 1942. Puny weakling Steve Rogers (Chris Evans) wants nothing more than to join to army and to protect his country, unfortunatley, he is turned away due to his many physical and health issues. Dr Abraham Erskine (Stanley Tucci) sees the good inside Steve and has him enlisted and recruited as part of the super-soldier experiment, which advances his height, makes him stronger and gives him muscles, giving birth to the legend that is Captain America.

Captain America was always going to be the most difficult superhero to sell the public on. Outside of America, there was the worry about marketing a superhero who could be seen as American propaganda, resulting in three countries leaving the "Captain America" part out of the film's title. It does appear that the fears were unfounded, considering the film made more than double it's budget back. Now, onto the review.

Monday, 26 December 2011

Scrooged (1988)

As it turns out, Bill Murray is afraid of ghosts after all

A cynically selfish TV executive gets haunted by three spirits bearing lessons on Christmas Eve. Now where have I heard that basic plot before?

Thursday, 22 December 2011

Trailer: The Dark Knight Rises (#2)

Following the death of District Attorney Harvey Dent, Batman assumes responsibility for Dent's crimes in order to protect Dent's reputation and is hunted as a fugitive by the Gotham City Police Department. Eight years after the events of The Dark Knight, Gotham has recovered from Joker's killing spree, and is experiencing a time of peace. A warning from the "enigmatic" Selina Kyle foreshadows a coming cataclysm, prompting Batman to return to the city where he must stop the villain Bane and his plans to destroy Gotham.

Bad Santa (2003)



This Santa's interested in a different kind of Ho, Ho, Ho



Willie Stokes (Billy Bob Thornton), A miserable conman, and his partner, Marcus (Tony Cox), pose as Santa and his Little Helper to rob department stores on Christmas Eve. But they run into problems when the conman befriends a troubled kid, and the security boss discovers the plot.

Monday, 19 December 2011

Rise of the Planet of the Apes (2011)

Get your stinking paws of this franchise, Tim Burton, you damn dirty ape

During experiments to find a cure for Alzheimer's disease, Dr Will Rodman (James Franco) raises across a genetically-enhanced chimpanzee, who turns out to posses greater intelligence, and will use said intelligence to eventually lead other apes to their freedom.

After 10 years without a Planet of the Apes film in sight, the re-emergence of this franchise did not set my pulse racing, and I did not expect much from a re-visit to an old franchise whose last endeavor wasn't very well received. I went into this film with no real expectations, and was pleasantly surprised with what I had witnessed.

Trailer: Wrath of the Titans

A decade after defeating the Kraken, Perseus is trying to live a quiet life as a fisherman while being the sole parent to his 10 year old son. Meanwhile, the gods are losing control of their imprisoned Titan, and their leader, Kronos, father of Hades, Posiedon and Zeus. Ares, son of Zeus, makes a deal with Kronos, siphoning Zeus' powers and unleashing hell on earth. So now Perseus, with Queen Andromeda and others, must venture into the underworld to defeat the Titans.

Sunday, 18 December 2011

Elf (2003)

The best way to spread Christmas cheer, is laughing out loud for all to hear



Buddy (Will Ferrell), one of Santa's elves, learns that he's actually a human and goes to New York City to meet his father, spreading christmas cheer in a world of cynics.

Saturday, 17 December 2011

Alvin and The Chipmunks: The Squeakquel (2009)

Three male chipmunks and three female chipmunks, a red title banner in the middle of the poster and three female chipmunks underneath
The film's intelligence goes no further than the stupid title

The world famous singing pre-teen chipmunk trio return to contend with the pressures of school, celebrity, and a rival female music group known as The Chipettes.

Let me make it perfectly clear that I have not seen the first Alvin and The Chipmunks film, so I will be reviewing this as a film in its own merit, and not a sequel. But to be honest, I don't think I would enjoy this more if I did see the first film.

Friday, 16 December 2011

Wounds of Misery (2011)

Wounds of Misery is a different type of film compared to what I usually review. It's an independent film by fellow reviewer and aspiring film maker Thomas Pollock, who runs his own review site as http://filmmasterjournal.blogspot.com. The official summary:
Alexander is a 14 year old boy who is abused by family and bullied in his school. His depression grows stronger and the melancholy and anger builds up inside him. He has now questioned living.

Tuesday, 13 December 2011

Babylon A.D. (2008)

The next Battlefield Earth?

Veteran-turned-mercenary Toorop takes the high-risk job of escorting a woman from Russia to America. Little does he know that she is host to an organism that a cult wants to harvest in order to produce a genetically modified Messiah.

Trailer: G.I. Joe: Retaliation

Little has been revealed about the actual plot. What we can ascertain from the trailer is that the G.I. Joe's will be framed for something, which puts them up against Cobra, including Zartan who was last seen disguised as the President of the United States at the end of the last film. This will lead to the president ordering their deaths, leaving very few remaining, including Roadblock, Snake Eyes and Bruce Willis.

Trailer: Men In Black III

Men in Black III involves a villain using time travel to go to the 60's in order to kill Agent Kay, which in turn triggers a series of events which'll end with the destruction of Earth. This leaves it up to Jay to go back in time and partner up with 60's Kay, played by Josh Brolin.

Monday, 12 December 2011

The Mummy (1999)

Mummified in development hell for 6 years, until Stephen Sommers came along

Over 3,000 years ago the high priest Imhotep (Arnold Vosloo) was given the all-important assignment of preparing the recently dead for their journey into the afterlife. However, Imhotep made one terrible mistake - he became smitten with Anck-Su-Namun, the mistress of the Pharaoh himself. Driven mad by jealousy and love, Imhotep murdered the Pharaoh, and his punishment was to be buried alive and suffer the torment of an eternal life in his wretched tomb. In 1925, a band of adventurers seeking fame and fortune - led by Rick O'Connel (Brendan Fraser), an American expatriate who has joined the foreign legion, and Evelyn Carnarvon (Rachel Weisz), an amateur archeologist - find a previously unknown burial site in Egypt. The team starts to dig, hoping to find lost riches, but instead they disturb the tomb of Imhotep, and soon the cursed priest rises from his grave to wreck vengeance on humanity.

Saturday, 10 December 2011

The Hangover: Part II (2011)


One night in Bangkok bears a similarity to one night in Vegas



Phil, Stu, Alan and Doug travel to Thailand for Stu’s wedding. After the bachelor party in Las Vegas, Stu takes no chances and opts for a safe, subdued pre-wedding brunch. However, things do not go as planned, as Phil, Stu and Alan wake up in Bangkok with Alan's head shaved, Stu's face tattooed similarly to Mike Tyson's and a monkey.


The Walking Dead: Season 2 - Part 1 (2011)

Walking Dead S2 Poster.jpg
A show that's more than just brainless fun



The first half of the second season follows on straight after the ending of the first season as Rick and his band of survivors aim to survive the zombie apocalypse. They leave Atlanta in order to reach Fort Benning, but come across a traffic jam.


*Warning: Spoilers abound, but not too many*





Friday, 9 December 2011

The Hangover (2009)

Three men and a baby wearing sunglasses."What happens in Vegas stays in Vegas. Except herpes, that shit'll come back with you"

To celebrate his upcoming marriage, Doug (Justin Bartha) is taken to Las Vegas to have his bachelor party, taken by his best friends Stu (Ed Helms) and Phil (Bradley Cooper), along with his future brother-in-law, Alan (Zach Galifianakis). The next morning, Alan, Phil and Stu wake up with the mother of all hangovers to find their hotel room completely trashed, a tiger in the bathroom, a baby in the closet, Doug is missing and they do not remember a single thing about the night before.

Monsters (2010)

The true monsters are the advertising executives


Six years ago, NASA discovered the possibility of alien life within our solar system. A probe was launched to collect samples, but crashed upon re-entry over Central America. Soon after, new life forms began to appear and grow. In an effort to stem the destruction that resulted, half of Mexico was quarantined as an Infected Zone. Today, the American and Mexican military still struggle to contain the massive creatures... Our story begins when a jaded US journalist (Scoot McNairy) begrudgingly agrees to find his boss' daughter, a shaken American tourist (Whitney Able) and escort her through the infected zone to the safety of the US border.


Thursday, 8 December 2011

Trailer: The Three Stooges

I am always trying to add new posts on here that aren't film reviews, because that can get boring after a while. So for a new segment, I thought to give a short review on any new trailers for upcoming films, and what better trailer to review than this trailer that was released yesterday?

Based on the mid-20th century comedy shorts, The Three Stooges is about, well, 3 stooges, who have to save their orphanage, and along the way uncover a murder plot and wind up starring in a reality TV show. It is produced, written and directed by the Farrelly brothers.

Wednesday, 7 December 2011

Sucker Punch (2011)




Snyder sucker punches the audience



Baby Doll (Emily Browning) is committed to a mental asylum by her sexually abusive step-father after he kills Baby Doll's younger sister and blames it on her. Baby Doll is to suffer a lobotomy, and retreats into an alternative reality as a coping strategy. In there, she envisions a plan which will help her, and four other girls, escape from the mental facility.



Transformers: Dark of the Moon (2011)

The poster depicts of a Transformer named Optimus Prime, standing with his blade on his left arm, and his blaster on his right arm, with a young couple standing below the Transformer, and standing in front of a crashlanded Decepticon fighter. The characters appear to be in the war-torn city of Chicago, with Decepticon battleships surrounding and guarding the city. The film title and credits are on the bottom of the poster.Disclaimer: Pink Floyd are in no way affiliated with this film, smart move

In 1961, American launched a mission to the moon, with their real intentions being to find what crashed on the moon, which actually was a ship from Cybertron, home planet of the Transformers.. Three years after the events of the second film, the Autobots continue to work for the NEST (Networked Elements: Supporters and Transformers) military force. Meanwhile, the Decepticons unveil a plan to use the new groundbreaking technology, the Pillars, to enslave Humanity in order to save Cybertron.






Monday, 5 December 2011

Blog: So what was in the briefcase after all?

In Pulp Fiction, Julius and Vincent are hired to bring a briefcase back to their boss, Marsellus Wallace. We are never shown what is inside that briefcase, nor are we ever given any glimpses inside the briefcase. All we know is that an orange glow emits whenever the briefcase is opened, it's worth killing over and, in the words of Pumpkin, "It's beautiful".

"I know something you don't"

Quentin Tarantino was originally going to have diamonds be the contents of the briefcase, but took it out as he felt it was too mundane. The only answer we've gotten is that "it's whatever the user wants it to be", so here's a few of my suggestions as to what the mysterious contents actually were.

Sunday, 4 December 2011

Brick (2005)


Cult hit or overrated?



Paying homage to noir flicks of the 40's, Brick tells the tale of Brendan Frye (Joseph Gordon-Levitt) who gets a call from Emily Kostich (Emile de Ravin), the ex-girlfriend he hasn't seen in two months, asking for help. Wanting to make sure she is okay, Brendan searches for her, eventually finding her, where she pleads for him to leave her alone. The next day, he finds Emily's dead body, and decides to find not only the murder, but the mastermind behind the murderer.


Bronson (2008)

Bronson


Britain's most violent prisoner makes his way to the big screen



Born into a respectable middle class family, Michael Gordon Peterson, re-named Charles Bronson by his fight promoter, would nevertheless become one of the United Kingdom's most dangerous criminals and is known for having spent almost his entire adult life in solitary confinement.


Friday, 2 December 2011

The Hunted (2003)






The scriptwriter needs to be hunted



Aaron Hallam (Benicio Del Toro) is a Special Forces operator who went renegade after suffering from severe battle stress and is now hunting people who come into the wilderness and brutally killing them. In order to stop Hallam, the FBI call in his former instructor, L.T Bonham (Tommy Lee Jones) to apprehend him.



Drive (2011)

Less Fast, More Furious

A hollywood stunt performer (Ryan Gosling) moonlights as a getaway driver. As a getaway driver, he works anonymously, never uses the same clients more than once and only allows his clients five minutes to do their business, otherwise they're on their own. When Irene (Carey Mulligan) and her son, Benicio, move in next door, the Driver strikes a relationship with the two. After Irene's husband, Standard (Oscar Isaac) is released from prison, he is confronted by a gangster who he owes "protection money" to. The Driver then offers his services to work with Standard, in order for the gang to leave Irene and her son alone.

Thursday, 1 December 2011

Horrible Bosses (2011)

Living the American dream


Nick (Jason Bateman) is an executive who is tricked into working to the bone for his boss, the ruthless Dave Harken (Kevin Spacey) only to be passed for promotion. Dale (Charlie Day) wants nothing more than to be the perfect husband, but his boss (Jennifer Ansiton) keeps sexually harassing him. Kurt (Jason Sudeikis) loves his job, thanks to his charming boss Jack Pellitt (Donald Sutherland), but when his boss dies of a heart attack, his douchebag coke-head son, Bobby (Colin Farrell) takes over, making Kurt hate his job like his friends. Fed up with their bosses, the three decide to actually kill their bosses, so they get the help from murder consultant, Dean "Motherfucker" Jones (Jamie Foxx). Needless to say, things don't go according to plan...

True Romance (1993)

Nothing says Romance, like drugs and murder


Clarence (Christian Slater) meets Alabama (Patricia Arquette), the woman of his dreams and spends one of the best nights of his life with her. She later comes clean to him that she's really a hooker, hired to keep Clarence company. After they get married, Clarence manages to steal cocaine from her pimp, and devises a plan to sell it in Hollywood. Meanwhile, the owners of the coke are trying to reclaim it.

Wednesday, 30 November 2011

Dexter - Get Gellar (2011)

Obviousness reveals itself

I know I haven't reviewed any other episodes from this season, but after seeing the latest episode, I felt I had to give my two cents on this episode and that twist, along with a few on this season.

Following on from the previous episode, Travis (Colin Hanks) has agreed to help Dexter get Professor Gellar (Edward James Olmos) in revenge for killing Travis' sister and using her as the 'Whore of Babylon'. Meanwhile, Debra's dealing with a rift she feels between her and Dexter, and something happens with Quinn.

Tuesday, 29 November 2011

G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra (2009)

In the center of the image are the titles and credits. Above them, in front of a brown background with orange flames and "Evil never looked so good" in red letters, a man in a hooded white suit holding a sword, a woman wearing sunglasses and a leather suit holding two guns, a masked man in battle fatigues holding a rifle, and a scarred man wearing a mask that covers his face below the eye. Below, against a blue background and blue flames, with "When all else fails, they don't" in blue letters, a man in a black bodysuit with a visor in his face holding a sword, and two men and women in leather suits holding guns.Cobra rising

An elite military unit comprised of special operatives known as G.I. Joe, operating out of The Pit, takes on an evil organization led by a notorious arms dealer.

Before going into my review, I feel I have to say that I did not follow any of the G.I. Joe franchise as a child, due to the fact I lived in Britain, where we got Action Man instead, so I only know the bare basics of G.I. Joe thanks to pop-culture references used (My thanks go to Family Guy and Robot Chicken) I'm saying this to let you know that I'll be judging the film by it's merits alone, not as an adaptation of a beloved action figure franchise.

Sunday, 27 November 2011

Psycho (1960)

The poster features a large image of a young woman in white underwear. The names of the main actors are featured down the right side of the poster. Smaller images of Anthony Perkins and John Gavin are above the words, written in large print, "Alfred Hitchcock's Psycho".We all go a little perfect sometimes

Secretary Marion Crane (Janet Leigh) wants nothing more than to marry her lover, Sam Loomis (John Gavin), so after getting the chance, steals $40,000 from her boss' client and drives off. Along the way, she comes across the secluded Bates Motel, and meets the owner, Norman Bates (Anthony Perkins).

Saturday, 26 November 2011

Blog: My Least Anticipated Films for 2012

2012 is a year with many movies we are looking forward to, be it the sequel to The Dark Knight, the latest Quentin Tarantino film or Ridley Scott's return to the Alien franchise (come on, you know it'll somehow be connected to Alien). But, the year can't just be filled with great films we look forward to, there also has to be the one's we curse studios for going ahead with, the one's we refuse to see. Here are the ten films I will not be at all anticipating next year.

Knowing (2009)

You'd be better off not knowing the ending

1958: A time capsule containing student drawings of the future is buried on the grounds and scheduled to be unearthed on the school's 50th anniversary. Instead of submitting a drawing, however, one little girl scribbles a series of seemingly random numbers on her paper before it is buried. Fifty years later, the time capsule is unearthed for a new generation of students to examine. Caleb Koestler (Chandler Canterbury) is one of those students. The mysterious sequence of numbers falling into his possession, Caleb takes the paper to his father, Professor John Koestler (Nicolas Cage), for examination. Studying the numbers, Professor Koestler soon discovers that they aren't random at all, but an encoded message containing the precise dates, death tolls, and coordinates of every major disaster since the time capsule was buried. Not only that, but the document also indicates that there will be three more such events.

Wednesday, 23 November 2011

Pulp Fiction (1994)

What's in the briefcase?

Pulp Fiction tells four stories of violence and redemption, detailing the intertwining lives of two mob hit men (John Travolta and Samuel L. Jackson), a boxer (Bruce Willis), a gangster's wife (Uma Thurman), and a pair of diner bandits (Tim Roth & Amanda Plummer).

WARNING: Review contains spoilers!!

Tuesday, 22 November 2011

Panic Room (2002)

Fincher devotees, panic!

Recently divorced Meg Altman (Jodie Foster) and her 11-year-old daughter Sarah (Kristen Stewart) have just purchased a four-story brownstone on the upper west side of New York City. The house's previous owner, a reclusive millionaire, installed an isolated room used to protect the house's occupants from intruders. The panic room is protected by concrete and steel on all sides, a thick steel door, and an extensive security system with multiple surveillance cameras and a separate phone line. On the night the two move into the home, it is broken into by Junior (Jared Leto), the grandson of the previous owner; Burnham (Forrest Whitaker), an employee of the residence's security company; and Raoul (Dwight Yoakam), ski mask-wearing gunman recruited by Junior. The three are after $3 million in bearer bonds, which are locked inside a floor safe in the panic room.

Saturday, 19 November 2011

17 Again (2009)

Efron playing a high school basketball player? What a shock

In 1989, 17 year-old Mike O'Donnell (Zac Efron) learns from his girlfriend Scarlett that she is pregnant during the start of his high school championship basketball game. Moments after the game begins, he abandons the game and goes after Scarlett. Twenty years later, Mike (Matthew Perry) finds his life stalled. Scarlett (Leslie Mann) has separated from him due to his regrets about abandoning college, forcing him to move in with his geeky and wealthy best friend since high school, Ned Gold; he quits his job and his high school-age children Maggie and Alex want nothing to do with him. Later, while visiting his high school to reminisce, an encounter with a mysterious janitor transforms Mike into his 17 year-old self.

Friday, 18 November 2011

Dinner for Schmucks (2010)

Steve Carell grinning maniacally stares from over Paul Rudd's shoulderThe real schmucks were behind making this film

An ambitious executive, Tim (Paul Rudd), has just landed his company an extremely wealthy Swiss client when his boss, Lance (Bruce Greenwood), invites him to an exclusive, yet unusually mean-spirited dinner party where each of the high-powered executives brings a guest to make fun of. Recognizing that his long-awaited promotion is finally within reach, Tim begins to have second thoughts about participating in the elaborate charade when his longtime girlfriend, Julie (Stephanie Szostak), the successful curator at a local art gallery, voices intense disdain for the idea. The following day, Tim is looking for a way out of the dinner when fate throws the perfect guest right in front of his luxury car. Barry (Steve Carell) is a sweet but dim-witted IRS agent with an unusual hobby: he creates elaborate dioramas featuring stuffed mice

Monday, 14 November 2011

Blog: In Brightest Day, In Blackest Night, DO YOU SPEAK ENGLISH, MOTHERF*CKER?

I came across something interesting as I was traversing my way across the web.

Apparently, Quentin Tarantino was once offered to direct the Green Lantern film.

So why didn't he do it?

Family Guy - Back to the Pilot (2011)

A cartoon drawing of an anthropomorphic white dog and a baby wearing red overalls looking up at a blimp with the words "Forgive Me Lois" written on it.Let's do the timewarp, again

After four weak episodes, Family Guy bounced back in spectacular form with an episode that rewarded long time fans of the show. The plot was Brian and Stewie went back in time to find a ball Brian once dug away back in January 31st 1999, which, coincidentally, is the day the first ever episode of Family Guy, known as "Death Has A Shadow", aired on television.

Sunday, 13 November 2011

X-Men: First Class (2011)

First Class Entertainment

Before Professor X and Magneto were fighting one another on opposing sides, they were University Graduate Charles Xavier (James McAvoy) and Nazi Hunter Erik Lensherr (Michael Fassbender), drawn together by their mutations, in order to stop a face from Erik's past from creating World War III, and destroying humankind.

Saturday, 12 November 2011

The Golden Child (1986)


Doesn't get a gold star

Chandler Jarrell (Eddie Murphy) is a social worker who's looking for a missing young girl. While searching for her, he is confronted by a woman (Charlotte Lewis) who tells him that he is the chosen one, who is destined to save The Golden Child, the savior of all mankind, from the clutches of the demon Sardo Numpsa (Charles Dance).

Daybreakers (2009)

Not the Coen's, but far from the Strauss'

The year is 2019. A plague has turned nearly all of the world's humans into vampires. A vampiric corporation sets out to capture the remaining humans and farm them while they search for a blood substitute to replace the ever-lessening amount of blood left in the world. Lead vampire hematologist Edward's (Ethan Hawke) work is interrupted by a band of human survivors, led by former vampire "Elvis" (Willem Dafoe), who has a cure that could save the human species from extinction.

Wednesday, 9 November 2011

The Adventures of Tintin (2011)


Indiana Jones and the Quiffed Belgian with a dog

Based upon the well loved comic books, Tintin is an intrepid young reporter who will go to far lengths with his dog Snowy for a good story, coming upon high adventure along the way.

Directed by Steven Spielberg, who co-produces with Peter Jackson in a script originally written by Doctor Who showrunner Steven Moffat, which was then rewritten by Edgar Wright and Attack The Block's Joe Cornish. With talent like this, how could The Adventures of Tintin not be brilliant?

Tuesday, 8 November 2011

Max Payne (2008)

A Max Payne in the arse

Detective Max Payne (Mark Wahlberg) is consumed with nothing more than finding the man responsible for murdering his wife and child, and in his quest for revenge, comes across a string of killings supposedly involving winged demons.

Saturday, 5 November 2011

Bowfinger (1999)

Giving Hollywood the Bowfinger

Bobby Bowfinger (Steve Martin) is an aspiring film maker, who has struggled for years to make it in Hollywood, resulting to no real success. Bobby has a script and a cast and crew of friends who are ready to go to work, so takes his script to a movie executive (Robert Downey Jr), who agrees to make the movie, provided that Bowfinger can secure action movie star Kit Ramsey (Eddie Murphy) to star in it. When Kit refuses to star in the movie, Bobby doesn't have the heart to tell his friends that Ramsey said No to the movie, so lies to them, and with the help of a young associate named Dave, they come up with a plan to follow Kit and film the movie around him without him knowing about it, whilst letting everyone else believe that Kit is method acting.

Wednesday, 2 November 2011

Dawn of the Dead (2004)



When there's no room in Development Hell, the Remake shall run on our screens



Ana (Sarah Polley) returns home after finishing a shift at the hospital, only to wake up the next day to the zombie apocalypse. Meeting Kenneth (Ving Rhames) and a number of other survivors, they make their way to hide out into a shopping mall, which soon becomes surrounded outside by swarms of zombies.

Monday, 31 October 2011

Halloween (1978)

File:Halloween cover.jpg
Not your standard trick or treating affair


On October 31st, 1963, Michael Myers murders his 15 years old sister, Judith. 15 years later, he escapes from a psychiatric hospital and returns home, stalking teenager Laurie Strode (Jamie Lee Curtis) and her friends. Michael's psychiatrist, Dr Sam Loomis (Donald Pleasence) suspects Michael's intentions, and follows him to Haddonfield to try and prevent him from killing.

Sunday, 30 October 2011

Ghosts of Girlfriends Past (2009)

Haunted by the ghosts of scripts past


Connor Mead (Matthew McConaughey), famous photographer and renowned womaniser, attends the wedding of his brother (Breckin Meyer), despite not believing in love or marriage, and comes across Jenny (Jennifer Garner), the only woman he ever actually loved. Later in the bathroom, Connor comes across the ghost of his Uncle Wayne (Michael Douglas), the man who Connor modeled himself after. Wayne tells him that three ghosts will appear throughout that night to show him his romantic past, present and future, in order to show him the error of his ways. Anyone else feel like this plot's familiar in some way?

Friday, 28 October 2011

The Evil Dead (1981)


The only evil here is Mary Whitehouse getting this film banned


Five college students, Ash Williams (Bruce Campbell), his sister Cheryl (Ellen Sandweiss), his girlfriend Linda (Betsy Baker), his college roommate Scotty (Hal Delrich) and Scotty's girlfriend Shelly (Theresa Tilly), all go for a vacation in a cabin that's isolated within the woods. Ash goes into the cellar and in there finds a horrific book (known in the sequels as the Necronomicon) and an audiotape. They play the tape, which is a recording of a man chanting an incantation, which unwittingly releases spirits and demons (known in the sequels as Deadites).



Tuesday, 25 October 2011

The Last Exorcism (2010)


Perhaps it was the script that needed an Exorcism

Reverend Cotton Marcus (Patrick Fabian) has performed fake exorcisms for years, and now, with the help of a film crew, is going to film his final exorcism, to take part in a documentary to expose exorcisms as a fraud. Cotton receives a letter which takes him and the crew to a farm, where a young girl, Nell (Ashley Bell) has become possessed. The Reverend performs the fake exorcism, but that's far from the end of things...

Saturday, 22 October 2011

Green Lantern (2011)


When Van Wilder and a Gossip Girl went to space

The Green Lantern Corps are intergalactic space police who patrol galaxy, with their power coming from the green energy which is put into their power rings, which is powered by willpower. The Green Lantern Abin Sur encounters an ancient entity he imprisoned years ago, Parallax, who feeds upon fear, and is mortally wounded in the encounter and escapes in a spaceship, which crashes upon Earth. Knowing he won't survive, Abin Sur has his power ring select a replacement, which chooses Hal Jordan (Ryan Reynolds) to take over and become the Green Lantern of Sector 2814 (Earth). Hal must overcome his fears and rise to the challenge of becoming a Green Lantern.



Wednesday, 19 October 2011

Breaking Bad - Pilot (2008)


Not your ordinary mid-life crisis

Walter White (Bryan Cranston) has just turned 50. He's living a mundane life as a high school chemistry teacher, whilst also working a second job at a Car Wash in order to support his pregnant wife (Anna Gunn) and his disabled son. After finding out he has lung cancer, Walter goes on a ride along with his DEA agent of a brother in law, where he witnesses a drug dealer get arrested, and notices Jesse (Aaron Paul), an ex-student of his, escaping from the scene. After tracking down Jesse, he proposes a partnership.

Before I give my review, allow me to explain my history with the show. I watched the first season back in 2009 when it aired over a week on 5USA, a channel that airs over here in England. I did not get to see the second season, as they did not air any promotion for the second series, and since then, no UK channel has bothered to rerun the show from the beginning or even pick up seasons 3 or 4. But having just watched the pilot episode, here's my review for it.


Monday, 10 October 2011

Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen (2009)

Lifeless and unrealistic, yes, Megan Fox is back

Two years after saving the world with the Autobots, Sam Witwicky (Shia LaBeouf) is away at college when an ancient Decepticon named "The Fallen" returns to Earth on a mission of vengeance. With the Allspark destroyed, the Autobots lose all hope of returning to their home planet of Cybertron, and begin working with an elite military known as NEST to hunt down any remaining Decepticons. Meanwhile, a series of inexplicable visions leaves Sam convinced that the struggle between good and evil is far from over, especially since the Decepticons have just discovered that Sam is the one human who possesses the ability to tip the balance of power to the Autobots' advantage, and they're determined to gain the upper hand by dispensing with him once and for all. Now, as Sam and Mikaela unearth a secret about the Transformers that alters the entire course of human history, the Decepticon known as The Fallen prepares to return -- and reclaim the plant once and for all

Saturday, 8 October 2011

Cars (2006)



Pixar not at full throttle

Lightning McQueen (Owen Wilson) is a hot shot rookie race car who cares about no-one but himself and reaching number one. He has a shot at becoming the winner of the Piston Cup, but has to go to California to compete in one more race against two other race cars he tied with. On the way, he gets seperated from his big rig, Mack, and in a frantic attempt to catch up, gets lost in the sleepy town of Radiator Springs on Route 66, and does some serious damage to the towns road. As a punishment, he is forced to re-tar the road. Whilst there, Lightning meets Sally the Porsche (Bonnie Hunt), Doc Hudson (the late great Paul Newman), and Mater the Tow Truck (Larry the Cable Guy), and the eager young racer learns that sometimes life is more about the voyage than the outcome of the race. 


Friday, 7 October 2011

Falling Down (1993)





As parodied on the Foo Fighters music video

It's just not William Foster's (Michael Douglas) day. Laid off from his defense job, Foster gets stuck in the middle on the mother of all traffic jams when he desperately just wants to attend his daughter's birthday party at the home of his ex-wife (Barbara Hershey). Foster abandons his car and begins walking, mentally unraveling along the way and striking out those who annoy him enough, including a Mcdonalds type restaurant who've stopped serving breakfast and a Korean store owner who charges too much for a can of Coke. Running amok with an arsenal of weapons at the ready Foster rapidly becomes a source of terror to some and a folk legend to  others. It's up to Prendergast (Robert Duvall), on the eve of his retirement, to bring down Foster.



Thursday, 6 October 2011

Blog: Arrested Development Movie Wishlist

The feature of this blog wishlist is the Arrested Development movie, which has been proposed ever since 2008, but has recently been told it's returning with a mini-series to come before the film. Since we know the series would consist of showing where each of the Bluths is at since the last episode, I shall be doing the wishlist on the movie. So what would truly make an Arrested Development movie?

Saturday, 1 October 2011

Thor (2011)


A Hammering Success (Sorry)

Thor (Chris Hemsworth) is the arrogant son of Odin (Anthony Hopkins), ruler of the mystical realm known as Asgard. After Thor's reckless actions threaten to reignite an ancient war, he is banished from Asgard with his power taken from him, forced to live amongst humans.


Monday, 26 September 2011

Blog: An intergalactic policeman, a WWII veteran, the god of thunder and a 20 something telepathic walk into HMV....

Green Lantern, Thor, Captain America, X-Men First Class. What do all of these films have in common? If you said "they're all superhero movies released this year" then you are right, but thats not the answer I was looking for.

X-Men Origins: Wolverine (2009)

Declawed, CGI style





Leading up to the events in the first X-Men film, X-Men Origins: Wolverine tells the story of James Howlett, and how he became Wolverine (Hugh Jackman), as well as his mysterious past, his complex relationship with Victor Creed (Liev Schreiber), and the ominous Weapon X program, as well as why he can't remember his past.

Monday, 19 September 2011

Prom Night (2008)

A Prom Night the audience won't want to remember





Donna (Brittany Snow) returns home one night to find her brother, father and mother all murdered by a teacher who's obsessed with her. The teacher gets arrested, and Donna tries to cope with what happened. 3 years later, Donna and her friends are getting ready for their Prom Night, but the teacher has escaped, and is determined to get Donna, ready to kill anyone who gets in his way.





Tuesday, 13 September 2011

Vantage Point (2008)

Disadvantage: Audience



As the president arrives in Salamanca, gunshots ring out and explosions happen. An American tourist (Whitaker) has captured footage of the would-be assassin on videotape, and now, as the stories of the other four witnesses unfold, each essential piece of the puzzle quickly falls into place. Forest Whitaker, Dennis Quaid, William Hurt, and Matthew Fox star in director Pete Travis' thriller in which an assassination attempt on the president of the United States is detailed from five unique perspectives.





Sunday, 11 September 2011

United 93 (2006)


A powerful achievement






United 93 tells the tale of the passengers onboard the United Airlines Flight 93, which was hijacked during the September 11th attacks.